I cannot wait for fall semester. I need a fresh start; a new beginning. This year has been really hard. Especially with Steve. You know, there was a time I couldn't remember life before him, but when I think about it I don't remember too much after him either... I was a bit too, uh... intoxicated. And I snogged so many boys! Why?!!! It was fun, but I just don't relate to that mindset anymore. And then finally Jeff, who I was completely smitten with. Maybe I was too intense or something, but I wouldn't know cause he never bothered to call or text me back, and that was four weeks ago. He could have at least made some sort of obvious excuse. Ugh! I really am looking forward to going back to school. My workload will be a lot harder but I know what to expect now and what I want to do with life. And I am taking this summer to figure out who I am and what I want. I know what I don't want. I don't want to be too hung over to function every weekend, I don't want to snog almost every boy I think is hot, I don't want to let myself get too attatched to someone just to get hurt. And I want to get over Steve. It's been a year, we don't even speak any more. We're over. We're over. We're over. My life is not.

Tomorrow is one year since Steve and I broke up. My heart has been aching all week. :[

I can submit to everything that has happened and live a life of excuses… or I can push myself. I can push myself and make my life good.

“Eventually one of two things will happen: He’ll realize you’re worth it or you’ll realize he isnt.

Yeah, he never bothered to call or text. I feel I am wasting my time, and I think it's time to worry about other things. Like getting rid of this freshman beer belly.